The Honeymoon is officially OVER!!!

That's it, no longer am I able to place Nico someplace and know that he'll be in basically the same spot when I get back. He is rolling everywhere now! From just getting onto his side from his back to the next day, rolling all the way over, and then over again, and then again, and then... well, you get the idea.



I've already rescued him from under the couch a few times. LOL



*sigh* Why did it have to go so fast??? I don't remember my bigger boys rolling this quickly, and especially not as a means to get all over the place. I think I'm in trouble!

Crazy Days

Why do I have the song "Summer Time, and the living is easy" going through my head when my life seems to be anything but? The boys and I all had dentist appointments today. I got the x-rays and we are starting a treatment plan for me (Yuck! but necessary). Matthew has 5 little cavities due to his weak enamel. Jonathan has 3 but 2 of them are filings that fell out. Christopher has none which is great news. The boys will be getting most of their work done next week and I have to look at my calendar to see when I can mine started. I'm soooo looking forward to spending hours and hours in the dentist chair. NOT

Tomorrow I have the photographer from the local paper coming to take the pictures for the story I was interviewed on last week. The house is presentable, or as good as it's going to get. I have everything I need ready to do some science experiements with Matthew so hopefully that will provide some good "homeschool" photos.

And I have to get our tax mess straightened out, some of it this week. Ugh! My plan is to get this done and then hand the whole mess over to an accountant. I can't handle this on top of homeschooling and a new baby. When it was just a normal return, I was fine, but with all the business stuff too??? It's just too much for right now.

Thankfully Nico has been down for over an hour so I think he's really down for the night. I'm as ready for tomorrow as I'm ever going to be so I better get some sleep since I got hardly any last night thanks to his highness.

Sleep, why sleep???

Why on earth would my mommy ever want to sleep??? There are waaaaay too many exciting things to see and do to waste time on sleeping. Especially at midnight! That's the best time to party and practice smiling and cooing. Silly mommy wanting to spend that time asleep.

And why does she keep complaining about not getting things done???? She holds me tons, feeds me lots, and plays with me whole bunches. What more is there that she should be doing?! I know she mutters something about cooking dinner and feeding my brothers but why can't they feed themselves? She sure is silly sometimes.

---Nico, the non-sleeping one

Update on the game...

I thought I would update on the movie game Mark and I are playing, again mostly for my own records and to make sure as we go along, we don't duplicate since I'm pretty sure that is going to be a no-no. So here's where we left off:

• Shawshank Redemption --> Batman Begins via Morgan Freeman


• Batman Begins --> Bram Stoker's Dracula via Gary Oldman


• Bram Stoker's Dracula --> Johnny Mnemonic via Keanu Reeves


• Johnny Mnemonic --> Dragonheart via Dina Meyer

Not sure where we are going to go from here. I'm thinking we will be moving on via Pete Postlethwaite as he's done some fun stuff that we have on dvd such as Alien 3, The Usual Suspects, and William Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet. Something to ponder on....

Monkeys and Delicious boys

We got the boys back today from my dad. It was fun trying to hook up at the Zoo and we have decided that my dad needs a cell phone. Just a little thing with a prepaid card but oh, so handy at times like these. We spent time at the Zoo hanging out while the kids played at the playground. Jonathan finally mastered the hanging rings which is impressive considering how small he is. I managed to capture that on my camera as well:

He was very proud of himself afterwards and was so thrilled that I caught it. Afterwards, I had to pay some bills so we headed over to Tanforan Mall which is finally open after a long remodel. We decided to eat there and have a look around. It's quite nice now and the food court got a considerable upgrade. Of course, the boys still wanted Burger King. *sigh* There was much rejoicing when I brought back Cold Stone Creamery for dessert tho. It was our first and I can see the fun of it so I think it will be an occasional treat from now on. I'm already thinking up fun combinations that I'd like to try.

And speaking of delicious, apparently my boys are quite tasty according to the mosquitos. They each have hordes of bites all over there faces. Matthew's arm is covered and somehow they didn't get the memo that Christopher's feet should be avoided at all costs (I'm wondering how many died before they figured it out). I ended up dosing them with benedryl and teaching them about the wonderousness of calamine lotion when we got home. Poor Christopher had about 10

Hmmm...still clean

So the house is still basically picked up and neat after 2 days with just the two little ones. True, Nico has been kind enough to take good naps both days but I've been keeping my normal schedule and playing lots with Jonathan with keeping up with my housework....but I haven't been doing tons of extra picking up. So I think I've found the mess culprits. I will definitely be having a talk with my older children when they come home tomorrow. If the 5yr old can figure out how to pick up after himself, the almost 8 & 11½ year olds better be able to as well.

Of course, if Jonathan had a say, we wouldn't be picking them up at all. I thought he would miss them terribly as they are always home and he is always bugging them to spend time with him. I guess I've been giving him enough attention as he was telling me today that he doesn't want them to come home because it's quieter with them gone and they aren't bugging him. They are set to have a few more weekends away over the summer so I guess it's nice that Jonathan doesn't mind that they go without him....I guess.

On a fun note, I managed to capture Nico rolling from tummy to back on my camera in video mode today. He's been doing it sporadically for a while now but today was the first time I was able to get a video of him doing it. It reminded me to find and charge my camcorder. Of course, that reminded me that I really want a digital camcorder and a dvr drive. I'm just never satisfied. LOL

Laundry Day

So I figured out what to do with myself while the big boys are off visiting their grandparents....Laundry! The laundry pile had yet again gotten out of hand (it's amazing how quickly that happens around here). I had a few loads that were clean but not folded plus I washed several more. Everything is now folded and everything but the hanging items are put away. Yeah!!!

I also got a few more things listed on Ebay in my efforts to declutter. I'll be so happy to have all this stuff out of my house.

Nico napped (whooohoooo!!!) so I managed to bake cookies and play some games with Jonathan. After lunch, we went to the park. I think he had a nice day getting lots of mommy time.

On another note, I was interviewed by the Review yesterday. One of the reporters is doing an article on homeschooling. I had put her in touch with some other homeschoolers as I don't feel myself really qualified to talk to a reporter about it. She contacted me and said she wanted to talk to me as well since the other ladies who had responded only had 1-2 children and she wanted to hear how I do it with 4 kids including a new baby. I guess the phone part went okay as she came over to talk further and interview Christopher. He thought that was pretty cool. Now I'll have a photographer coming over next week to take pictures of the boys doing some schoolwork.

It's summer...

and the decluttering has officially begun! Jonathan took this picture of some of the boxes leaving my house today. I'm selling the last of my maternity stuff on eBay as well as some of the cuter & nicer baby clothes as Nico outgrows them and some nursing clothing mistakes. On top of those items that are being sold, the boys school stuff is packed up and in my truck to be taken the UPS store tomorrow! That's 3 more boxes of books and such out of the house. Then there is the box of misc items that I'm decluttering. I had the boys adding to it out of their room today.

So there are several big boxes in my living room right now, which is annoying to say the least. But the good part about them is that none of them or their contents are staying! One is for donation, one for eBay or donation what doesn't sell, and one is a box of housewarming gifts for my best friend who just got her first apartment. Hopefully it will all be gone in a week or so.

And once the main house is decluttered....the shed!

Doctors, doctors everywhere

Just one of those days where it seemed like everyone had a drs apt. Nico had his 4mo well baby check and is now 11lbs 11ozs (just under 5th percentile) and 25-3/4" (around 75%) so long and lean. He's gained 2lbs 2ozs in 2mos so the dr was okay with his weight gain. He hadn't been gaining much the first couple of weeks but he's gained about a lb in the last 3wks so things are starting to turn around. He's a happy, alert little tyke who is busy trying to engage everyone he meets into playing with him. Did I mention how much I love him???? LOL


Christopher is also doing well. He went in for his 11yr well kid check (just a tad overdue). He's 73lbs (25%) and 57" (50%) which is typical for him. I reminded him to talk to the dr about all the stupid little aches and pains Mr Drama is always complaining about (usually when he should be doing schoolwork but they never seem to bother as much when playing video games...hmmmm) and the dr confirmed what I've been saying which is they are just ligaments and muscles growing and stretching and it's nothing to be concerned with.


I also had an eye exam today, my first in 12yrs. I got a scolding for going so long as I do wear glasses and should be checked every 2yrs. But she was amazed when she checked me that my perscription has barely changed. So that's good news. I'll be looking at contacts and a new pair of glasses soon but I can easily keep this pair for back-up.


I'm trying to get Nico on a better schedule now that we are on summer break and I can dedicate a little more time to that. I'm hoping to get some things caught up later this week when the 2 biggest boys are at my dad's. Wow! I'll be down to only 2 kids! Whatever will I do with myself??? LOL

Happy Father's Day

So I think Mark had a good Father's Day. We picked up the PS2 guitar and game on Friday for him and I had already ordered a few dvds on Amazon. He woke up this morning to coffee and the kids were actually quiet enough that he got to sleep in (why couldn't they do this on Mother's Day???).

So here sits my husband with his new toy and new son, a cup of coffee nearby. What more could any man ask for? Why an outing to Malibu Grand Prix for race car driving with his boys! So off we went to spend a few hours driving the kids around the race track. I actually managed a few respectable times (under 1min) and then the awful lap of over 2min because I was trying to make Jonathan happy and he didn't like the way his head went "bumpity bumpity around" when we went fast. LOL

After the track it was time for dinner. We ended up at Windy City Pizza which does NOT make Chicago style pizza! Yes, I'm now an authority on it and that wasn't it. What made it even worse is that they had menus and brochures of Edwardo's and Giordano's up on the walls showing exactly what they SHOULD have been making. Seeing those menu's really made me miss Chicago and the great time I had with my friends there last month. Mark is saying we need to win the lotto so we can start up a pizza place that serves real Chicago-style pizza but on a sourdough crust to make it more San Franciscan.

I had a brain once upon a time

and if anyone sees it while vacationing in the Bahamas (or more likely the Bermuda Triangle) would you please ask it to drop by for a visit. I miss it terribly.

Today was soccer. Not unusual for a Saturday in June around here. Admittedly, I haven't had 2 playing soccer often (this is the second season and the first was a few years ago) but you'd think I could learn to look at the calendar to confirm the times the boys are playing. I thought I had. Maybe I was looking at next weeks???? I dunno but it sure wasn't this week. After finally getting everyone out of the house, we arrived at the field 5min late for Jonathan's game....If it had been at 9am like I had thought. It wasn't, it was at 11am! I had dropped Mark off with Jonathan while I went to find a parking space, get the other kids out of the car, grab snacks, and all that stuff. He calls me telling me he can' t find Jonathan's team anywhere. I arrive on site and realize what must have happened. Ummmm...sorry hon?!

However, we were there 15min early for Matthew's warm-up before his 10am game. So it wasn't all bad. However, I would still like my brain back. And my stomache muscles too if anyone finds those out and about. *sigh*

Ding Dong, The School Year's Done!!!!

Nope, definitely not excited at all. Not me, no way.....Yeah right! I think I'm more excited about summer vacation than I was as a kid! Finally I can have some time during the day for things I need to get done instead of having to keep after the big boys to do their work and be at their beck-n-call to deal with school issues. We are taking off a week to detox and I'll be making plans to try and keep them busy as much as possible. It is so true that the devil makes work for idle hands so it's in my best interest to keep them from having too much idle time.

So after doing a little school work (see, we did do something even on the last day and I'm happy to report that Christopher got 100% of his 6th grade work completed!!!) I took the boys to go see Garfield 2 with my mom and brother. Everyone enjoyed it, even Nico who seemed to be enthralled after getting his lunch. After that we headed over to Draeger's so I could check it out for once. Picked up Mark and headed out to Red Robin for dinner. The kids love that place (still not sure why) and it's better than their usual fave of UpChuckCheese. Hit TRU for Mark's Father's Day present. He wanted the new guitar controller and game for the PS2. Hmmmm...I wonder where my children get their urge to veg in front of the computer all day?! Then we did the Costco shopping where we literally filled every nook and cranny of the suburban. I think we might have enough fresh fruit to last us a week tho, maybe 1½wks if I'm lucky. If I'm super lucky, the milk will last that long. I can only imagine how it's going to be when they're teenagers. Yikes!

Stupid but fun little game

So Mark and I have started our own stupid but fun little game that we are currently playing. We'll probably be playing it for a looooong while but that's okay, we're having fun. The game is how to go through our movie collection using actors to jump from one film to the next. We always fall asleep watching a movie so we can have some noise on, especially with our lovely racoon neighbors who love to party on our roof.

Our rules:

We can't use the same actor twice in a row and we can't do sequels. There has been talk of allowing jumps by director as well but that rule is still under consideration. We've been playing for a few weeks now and here is our current list of movies watched:

• Broken Arrow --> Face-off via John Travolta


• Face-off --> The Rock via Nicholas Cage


• The Rock --> Entrapment via Sean Connery


• Entrapment --> Mask of Zorro via Catherine Zeta-Jones


• Mask of Zorro -->Silence of the Lambs via Anthony Hopkins


• Silence of the Lambs --> Contact via Jody Foster


• Contact --> Starship Troopers via Jake Busey


• Starship Troopers --> Shawshank Redemption via Clancy Brown


• Shawshank Redemption --> Batman Begins via Morgan Freeman

I'm pretty sure we wont' be able to get through our entire movie collection (at least the stuff we'd want to see LOL) this way as I don't think we can connect to our Jackie Chan collection enough and I'm not seeing any way to get us to things like Gone with the Wind, Auntie Mame, or the King and I. It will be interesting to see if we can find our way into those at all. I'll update on this next week, more for my own amuesement and desire to watch how this goes than for any other reason. LOL

Why, oh why don't they get it???

I love my boys dearly but I'm having a real hard time figuring them out right now. We are almost done with "official" school time but for the life of them, they can't figure out how to settle down and finish up a day's work in under 12hrs! And I've assigned them 1/2 days worth of work. I understand the break is right around the corner and have tried to make sure they they could be done by lunch or just after so as to increase their play time. Instead, they fight me on it and drag their heels and fuss and call out to each other about some video game crapola or whatever other stupid little thing they can find to distract them from doing their work. Which in turn means more work for me as I have to be constantly on them to get it done which means I'm not able to really get into any of the gazillion projects I have that need tending to (bills anyone???). I just can't fathom why they would rather take hours to not get it done which means they just come back to it the next day on top of not getting any video game time instead of getting it done quickly and having the rest of the day to play. I keep pointing it out to them too and they keep saying they want time to play....Well Prove It!!!! Do the work and stop torturing all of us!!!

End Rant

Okay, I know I said I was going to try to stay positive on these but after spending over $500 to fix my car, the big boys refusing to get their work done, Jonathan not listening to me and sneaking tv everytime I was off trying to deal with the big boys not working, Nico being seriously cranky, and both he and I dealing with thrush for the 7th time (no joking)....well, I'm just having a hard time seeing much positive in the day.

Oh, wait....My sink is shining again! Nico did take a bit of a nap this morning and I was able to do a little laundry, the dishes, and polish my sink up real pretty. And Mark even took care of the dishes while I folded laundry tonight. My truck is running again. And his highness is finally asleep and not screaming at me.

Bit of a bummer day

I think this is how everyone felt today. We were supposed to go on a field trip to San Juan Bautista Mission. I signed up for it back in January because Christopher's goal in life is to see all the California Missions. I think this is a worthy goal so I've been trying to find ways to help him accomplish this. Got everyone up this morning, fed, and lunches packed. Woke up Nico, fed him, got him in his carseat and we were off. I hadn't driven more than 3 miles from home when I see my temperature gauge rising quickly. Not good. Call Mark and get his take on it. We find it odd because yesterday he did some running around but we checked the overflow to the radiator since we've been having some problems with leaking and there was plenty there. I pulled into a gas station and the radiator is basically empty. A very kind man took a quick look for me and agreed it was the water pump which is what we had been told last week when it leaked out all the coolant we had just had put in. We thought we had significantly slowed, if not stopped, the leak but apparently not. It's a real pain because it was replaced just 1½ yrs ago and now I'm looking at probably having to pay to have it replaced again. Ugh! Anyway, the nice man helped me fill the radiator and I took 3 very disappointed boys home again.

So instead we did a few little lessons and then made popcorn and watched Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Mark is taking the car to the shop in the morning so I'll be w/o a vehicle tomorrow so Jonathan will miss soccer practice. Thankfully we can walk to gymnastics. The heathens don't do well when cooped up in the house for too long.

On a bright note tho, Christopher is now enrolled for the College for Kids classes. He didn't get all the ones he wanted (mommy needs to get that sent in first thing next year) but he said he'd be happy to try the art classes that are still open. I'm hoping he has fun with them and doesn't get upset that things aren't perfect.

Sweet Nico, you are 4 months old today!

I can't believe it's been a year since I found out I was pregnant and now my sweet little man is 4 months old. Each day seems to take so long (especially in the first trimester) but I turned around and blinked somewhere in there and now look at you! You are now 11lbs 4oz and about 25½" long.
Your smile never fails to melt my heart and you are learning so much every day. My life is so much more complete for your being here and I'm so thankful to be your mommy.

I love you, my precious Nico!

What is this stuff????

So we started cereal this week with Nico. His first response was pretty standard...."What the heck is this stuff????" But after a few spoonfuls, he started lunging at the spoon. This lasted a little bit until his evil twin came along and decided that life was awful and this should be announced at the top of his lungs with an earsplitting scream (the usual way his evil twin announces his prescence unfortunately). (picture taken by Jonathan)

We tried again the next day and a few more bites went down before the evil twin let his prescence be known. And a few more bites the next day. Today it's been 6 days since we started with his getting cereal about 4xs and I think he actually ate about a full tablespoon before the scream appeared. I'm planning on giving the rice another week and then we'll start oatmeal. Time for mommy to clean out the freezer, get the grinder out, and start making baby food again.

We've also figured out why he's not been going to sleep well these last 2wks, we weren't swaddling! Silly us thought that he might be getting a bit big for the whole swaddling thing and we kept trying to not swaddle him when getting him ready for bed until it was after 11p and he'd already been put down several times only to wake up in less than 20min. So far, he's been out now for about 45min, it's 10:20p, an dit's looking like he's down for the night. Now I'm wondering if he'll sleep longer than 5hrs tonite which has been the average the last several nights. If that's the case, I'm going out and buying the bigger swaddle blankets. I want my sleep!!!

I love this age!

It's hard to pick a favorite stage of a baby or child's life but this age is definitely right up there. Nico is so alert these days and so responsive to the world around him (maybe a little too much so during a feeding). I love watching him trying to figure things out. I love seeing that smile that melts my heart or hearing him start to laugh out loud. Angels must sound like that when they sing. It's truly the most beautiful sound in the world.

What's even more fun is that he is now getting into actually playing with his toys. It used to be that he liked watching his brothers shake, rattle, and roll for his amusement but these days, he's the one shaken things (before putting them in his mouth of course). What's even better is the look in his eyes when he tries to grab something or push it and it makes noise back. He is starting to find that funny and laugh when it happens.

Of course with all this has come the new game he loves to play with his brothers....Fetch! Boy, he's picked that one up quick and so have Matthew and Jonathan. LOL I'm wondering how long before they tire of it. I know it won't be before he does.

But with all this play comes a new time as well...NAP!!! He's actually been starting to nap a bit more these days and this must be what Angels look like when they sleep. His nighttime sleeps haven't been what we are used to but he is starting to nap for maybe 20min in his crib a few times a day and the 2hr naps in the swing are becoming a bit more regular. Maybe if I put him in the swing at a regular time each day, he might give me that lovely 2-3hr daily nap I've been craving. Hmmmmm....

Is school over yet????

I'm sooooo done with school with the kids. Too bad the state says we still have another week to go. Ugh! I think Jonathan has the right idea in hiding under the crib so no one can find him (for those who are paranoid, he climbs under there from the back and calls it his secret hiding place, I only make sure there is room there so he doesn't damage anything, honest!).

On a good note, we had our face-to-face with our teacher today. Even tho I homeschool, we do it through a state run charter so I have paperwork to fill out and work samples to turn in to prove we aren't just sitting around eating bonbons and watching tv all day (we do but I make sure the kids do their one work sample to turn in so we don't get in trouble.....shhhhhh!).

Christopher is advancing to the 7th grade with no problems. We are still trying to get his new math course in now instead of having to wait til the start of the new school year so we can try to keep summer brain rot to a minimum. He already has the materials for Language Arts and Literature so to help with it as well.

Matthew will be starting 3rd grade in the fall but has been working with the 3rd grade materials for a few months now. His big goal is to finish 3rd grade math over the summer so he can start 4th grade math in the fall. I think my biggest challenge will be keeping him from doing all his science over the summer months to the exclusion of all else. Mostly because the number of labs and amount of time it would require from me is waaaaay more than I want to think about over this summer.

Jonathan is going to be starting Kindergarten in the fall but I'll be doing my own program for him to start with. I keep waffling about putting him in with the boys but it's a whole lot of work and I'm not sure either one of us is up for it. I have started doing some work with him with Math Mastermind and his Bright Minds workbooks (Can you find me?, Building Thinking Skills, and Mind Benders). I got some new books for him today to work on over the summer and we'll probably start Hooked on Phonics as well. What he really needs tho is mommy to find a few minutes to call the school district about his speech therapy tho. I can see that being a big problem for him with reading.

One huge thing for me is that I contacted a few people today about getting a mother's helper and babysitter. I have several big projects that need to get done and this summer would be a great time but Nico needs so much attention that it's impossible to get the time I need on them during the week and our weekends are always full. I also want to start trying to get out with Mark every other week or so, even if its just for an hour of drinks and appetizers, so we can reconnect. After having Jonathan in our bed for years and him only moving on once I was pregnant with Nico, it's definitely put us into full-time parent mode and I want to find that husband/wife relationship again. Here's hoping that they don't run screaming when they hear that I have 4 boys! LOL

My budding photographer

So Matthew has really getting into photography recently and is turning out to be rather good. He frequently borrows my camera and I've now promised him a digital camera for his birthday. The funny part is, the one we are probably getting him is the next step up from the one I have currently. It's not a big difference so I don't mind really but I find it amusing nonetheless. He, of course, thinks its the funniest thing ever that he'll have a 'better' camera than mommy. Better in this case meaning .1mp higher quality. But hey, whatever makes him happy.


It was very interesting as I was doing some shopping around for something for him. He wanted a red camera but when I showed him some but informed him that they didn't have optical zoom and their macro setting probably wasn't too good, he passed. He was all into the optical zoom stuff. We had a lesson on macro setting and when to use it today. He was taking some close-ups of Nico that were fuzzy and he couldn't figure out why so I showed him how to use the macro and what a difference it made. He then practiced on his kitty.

I really love seeing some of the photos he comes up with. It's such a wonderful glimpse into the way he sees the world. Sometimes very silly but he can also get some of the most tender moments as well. I have some beautiful shots of Nico that he took. I think Nico will be the first child where there are actually shots of me holding and playing with him because of Matthew. That is something to truly cherish and I'm thankful to him for that precious gift.

Tuesday, the new Monday

I used to hate Mondays but I've gotten over that. Tuesdays on the other hand always leave me breathless. With trying to get the kids to get anything done this close to summer vacation (and who is looking forward to that more, them or me?!) and so off their schedules, add in a gymnastics class for Jonathan in the afternoon followed immediately by Christopher's trampoline class, and now since that wasn't crazy enough, Jonathan's soccer practice starts at the same time Christopher's trampoline class ends. Hard to be in two places at once since I still haven't figured out how to clone myself (tho apparently I'm good at cloning my children) so we are always late. Today the soccer bag didn't get put in the truck so we had to come back during Christopher's class to get Jonathan's gear. We got there late and practice let out early due to several meltdowns by the players (tho I'm happy to report that Jonathan wasn't one of them).

So all in all, Tuesdays are a busy day after what is usually a more peaceful Monday. I'm looking forward to Wednesdays more and more now. A usually unremarkable day of the week, I'm happy to spend it at home doing some catch-up around the house when Nico lets me. The big boys have their gymnastics but I'm thankful that we live close enough that they can walk. If I'm truly lucky, Nico will nap while they are gone and I can get dinner started in peace and then spend some quiet time with Jonathan. It's so rare to have quiet 1-1 time with any of the boys and I treasure it. His current favorite things to do with me are play Uno Splash! or his workbook called "Can you find me?". He just finished the Pre-K book and we are now starting the K-1 book which thrilled him at what a big boy he is (and made mommy just a little sad).

So here's to Wednesday....My midweek Saturday

Why am I doing this and where to start...

So why am I doing this? It's a question I often ask myself about so many things. I always feel like I have way too many things on my plate and my to-do list is a mile long and seems to have more things added daily while I rarely cross anything off. So why am I trying to carve out time to blog?

My only answer to that question for myself is....because all my friends are doing it! LOL Seriously, several of them are and they got me to thinking about it. For me, I'm watching my baby grow up. I'm remember that it was this time last year that I found out I was pregnant with my 4th and final child and here it is a year later and he is almost 4mos old and I can't stand how quickly the time is flying. I so wish I could freeze time and keep him a baby for just that much longer.

But yet I turn around and I see his great smile and hear him laugh and remember how 3mos ago, he couldn't do that and my heart swells with so much joy that I start tearing up at how much he has grown but how wonderful this new stage is even tho I miss the last one terribly.

I'm packing up his bassinet now to give to someone else for their precious baby. I'm dropping off a huge bag of his 0-3mos clothes at a local low-income housing complex so others can use them. So many of those clothes were worn by my oldest, now 11½ yr old, and it saddens me to see them go. There are so many memories there. I bought that bassinet for my second son. These things have been such a big part of my life for so many years and while I'm ready to move on and am happy with how my family is now complete, it's still hard to close out this chapter in my life.

So now I'm blogging. Just jotting my thoughts down on the keyboard. I'm watching my oldest going through growing pains as he is starting to enter the turbulant pre-teen years. My second son is still a huge jokester and acts so tough sometimes, but in his heart he is still my sweet boy who loves to cuddle with his mama. My monkey boy is looking so grown up now. He'll be eligible for Kindergarten in the fall and even tho we are homeschooling, I know I'll be bawling come the fall when I realize he is now officially in "school". That just shouldn't be possible. I'm just thankful that he too still loves to cuddle.

So I'm doing this to have something to try and remember these days with. I'm doing this to try to find something positive in each day to think about and reflect back on. I'm doing this in an effort to try and find a few minutes for myself to just think outloud (in a manner of speaking) and try to organize my thoughts. It seems like I have almost no time to even read and answer emails these days. Nico hates being anything less than the center of my universe when he's awake....and he's always awake. LOL I love him to pieces but I think my sanity could use with him taking a good 2-3hr nap each day so I could get a few things done and collect my bearings. I keep telling him if he could do that, I'd be willing to hold him and play with him the rest of the time he's awake. He hasn't taken me up on that yet tho. Probably a good thing as I'm not sure I could actually pull it off but I'd be willing to try. LOL